Too often our political discussions involve shouting at one another, waiting until the other is finished speaking in order to say our piece, looking for ways to undermine and attack the other, feeling angry, misunderstood, unheard and self-righteous. When a subject is very important to us, especially if we feel afraid or violated, it is easy for our emotions to be triggered. We stop listening and snap back, triggering anger, fear or disrespect in others, and so they stop listening to us. We should sincerely listen to others with the intention of understanding them at a deep level. They will then feel understood. We must suspend our judgement and see the best in the other person that so they put their best selves and ideas across. That is rare in politics.